Without Explanation

“An Englishman goes to church rather like he goes to the toilet: with the minimum of fuss, and preferrably without explanation” (our friend Bernie, opening a Bible study a few years ago)
Visitors to Argentina soon discover that every public toilet is attended by a Rottweiler, dressed up as a female person. Her main responsibilities involve handing a carefully measured length of toilet paper to each customer, in exchange for a coin; and saying “pa-se” when a cubicle becomes free. To be fair, if I’d been doing that for a few years, I can imagine that I might become a bit growly.

This week the Rottweiler in the minibus station has come up with an alternative diversion much more sophisticated than biting people’s ankles. She now requires each prospective toilet-user to announce publicly exactly what they are planning on putting into the toilet, so that she can then decide whether to point them to the cubicle where the flush uses a lot of water, or the one where the flush doesn’t work too well.

By luck or by the abundant mercy of God, just over the road there is a little coffee bar, where for the modest price of a small coffee, patrons may also use the toilet for free and for nothing, and most importantly without explanation. I am so English!

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